I wanted someone like my dad and, I suppose if I’m honest, someone who could make up for what I was afraid I might be lacking. He was also understated, often quiet in a group, and quick to praise others for excelling in ways he didn’t. And that’s when I knew I had lost something really, really good before I ever had it. After two years apart, when I had given up on him for good, Kyle sent me a friendly little Facebook message.He had absolutely no bravado and was a true introvert. He had done some soul-searching too, and he came back for me.If you’re that introverted writer looking for an Oscar one day, then arrange your life so that you cross paths with women who have a deep appreciation for thoughtful communication, an unwavering support through failure and an intelligent compassion.Bottom line: When it comes to finding your “dream woman”, first you must honestly, unflinchingly envision the future you really want for yourself.So get to work…as in right now…clarifying your personal “vision” of an exciting, happy, fulfilling life. The qualities that your “dream woman” must possess to share and help you achieve those dreams will become immediately obvious. Are you an outgoing world-traveler with dreams of sailing the world?Or an introverted screenwriter hell-bent to winning an Oscar for best screenplay?
I wanted the smartest, most confident guy in the room.Where he was at first self-conscious, he turned out to be downright goofy.He does these spot-on impressions of people we know or characters from shows; it’s like I married a comedian.When we dated the second time, a whole new world opened up to me, and I learned a few important things about real love.The first time I dated Kyle, during the most stressful epoch of his life, I had no idea how hilarious he was.