If my date cancelled or wasn’t available, I was plunged into despair.
I needed companionship NOW, which meant I needed it too much. I dated a couple guys who wanted me to change to meet their needs. But one year into my loss, I worried, “What’s wrong with me? ” If someone doesn’t recognize your wonderfulness, that’s their problem.
I sleepwalked through much of it, too tired to enjoy the fast-paced sightseeing and being out of my comfort zone.
Similarly, 14 months after his death, I found traveling to meet dates and figuring out new locales to be enervating.
But I was still too wounded and vulnerable, making me needy.
There are always questions to ask your boyfriend, like his life, his past and his present, as well as what his plans for the future are.
There is a good chance that even if you have tried raising some of these questions, he has not been too forthcoming in his answers.
Far better to spend your time with friends who will buoy you up as you figure out who you are in this new world.
The first year and a half, even two years, after my loss I was often exhausted.